This is not where I saw my self 3 years ago. Heck, this isn’t where I thought I’d be earlier this year. Alas, here I am and I still cannot figure out why. I did everything right. I worked hard in college, harder than a lot of my classmates. I learned everything I could. I experimented with technique. I spent a semester in LA, worked hard at my internship. Freelanced for a growing company that was a front runner in live streaming with contracts with ESPN and the NCAA. I traveled Europe and flew around the world. I have a good impressive resume. Where did that get me?
A job as a part time janitor at a church in Columbia, South Carolina.
Ask anyone who has ever met me in the past 8 years and most would have expected me to get and keep some sort of media job. I don’t think anyone expected this. I should have. Sometimes no matter how hard you try, even if you do all the right things, you still lose to the well liked popular ones. An unusual oddball like me cannot compete with the popular kids. They are the ones everyone likes, thinks are super amazing at everything they touch, and are supported by the masses to reach their dreams. And a good amount of the time their work is mediocre. I never left the shadow of the <insert college classmates here> of the world.
And yet I am somehow no longer bitter about it. Shocking I know. A lot of individuals might think I should be. The people i see experience success in life are the same people who always get the job, get the support, get the recognition, and sometimes get the girl (unless they are a girl). And yet I am no longer bitter about it. How odd.
Yes, I am equally skilled with a camera given the opportunity and I can prove that my creativity is up to par or better than most of my esteemed peers. Yet I work as a part time janitor at an ever expanding hip fundamental church in Columbia.
Pay attention to the arrangement of my words. I never say once in this blog post that I a janitor. I am not my job.
I say this as a reminder to myself. Don’t get me wrong, I actually like my job. It is weird to think that I am technically on staff at a church. I serve with some good people and I look forward to getting to know them better. This is a good opportunity for me
However, I am not the job.
We live in a world that likes to label us by what we are. That is our identity and all the stigmas that come with it. In the grand scheme of things, as christians, our identities should be found in Christ Jesus. This is the very typical christian cliche when it comes to situations like this.
What does that even mean?
With everything I have been going through lately, I think that one’s identity in Christ is more complex and more extraordinary than we believe. Sure, as a devout (yet incredibly flawed) follower of Christ I have gone through some rather rough times. Jesus even said in the Gospels that following Him is a long and difficult road. Yet my greatest accomplishments have been in the service of Christ. All of my travels have been the result of following Him, especially this last trip I took to Quebec.
Even so, my travels are not my identity. Its might be a big part of who I am and something i am very passionate about. But this is not my identity (something else I struggled with).
I am not the job. I am so much more than you can ever imagine.
I am a kilt wearing, @$$ kicking, camera wielding, geeky, nerdy, D&D playing, tea drinking, globe trotting, metal listening, artistic, creative, multicultural, computer literate, cinephile, video editing, picture taking, friendly, kind, care, good natured, compassionate, inquisitive, abstract thinking, emotional, introverted, hurt, scared, depressed, lost, confused messy, quiet, stonge willed bald, bearded, independent, hansom, witty, intelligent, smart, educated, every learning, grace needing, nature loving, people loving, unique and one of a kind bachelor who has submitted is own free will to Jesus Christ. I just happen to currently work as a janitor part time at a growing hip fundamentalist church in Columbia, SC. And that only scratches the surface of I am.
This is just the introduction. I am only getting started.
Did I forget anything?